How many times have you been excited to share big news with someone in your life, only to be criticized and put down? We have all had experience with dealing with people who criticize. It is a frustrating and negative conversation that usually leaves you feeling drained and questioning your relationship with the person. Here are some helpful tips on applying your yoga values and how to deal with critical people.
How to Deal With Critical People
Tap into the second of the yamas, Satya. This yama starts with you: being honest with yourself, being mindful about your own truth, staying true to yourself, seeking the truth, and understanding the truth. That being said, when it comes to criticism:
- Try not to take it personally: It is good to understand this tough truth that people who criticize tend to do so to everyone in their lives. Meaning, the words they say are not only directed to you, so do not take them personally. You might consider their behavior to be rude, but this is where the yoga yamas come in very handy: take what they are saying with a giant grain of salt and let the hurtful words roll off your shoulders.
- Focus on the ‘what’ vs. the ‘how’: This relates to the old phrase, “It is not what you say, but how you say it.” When thinking about how to deal with critical people, try to see past the delivery of any negative messaging and focus on what the person is telling you. Critical people often have a hard time delivering messages in a tactful way, so make it your job to find the truth and get to the root of the message they are trying to convey.
- Honest feedback is good feedback: While the delivery of the message from a critical person might be terrible when you get to the root of the message, you might consider or think about something you had not before. In the spirit of accepting people for who they are, you should consider the value of having someone in your life that gives you speaks the truth and gives you their honest opinion.
- Explain yourself: Before you start speaking with a person you know to be critical, give them some background on what you want to talk about and what you’re looking to receive from them: be truthful about what you want. This is a great tactic in how to deal with critical people. Setting the stage in this way might disarm them from being too critical. For example, start out by saying, “I have some exciting news and I wanted to share it with you first. I’m really looking for support.” This type of statement sets the expectation that you would like the other person to be positive and excited for you.
Using satya to deal with critical people got you drained? Find a way to recharge or reset. Take a few minutes to meditate and center yourself so you can enjoy the present moment again.
Looking for more? Check out this post on the Law of Attraction and how bringing positive and new energy into your relationships can help you improve your life.